Blog & News

Elegy for a Friend

Elegy for a Friend

A friend died of Covid this year Her husband died, too, just days before. Recently, I was walking in her neighborhood and I found myself passing the street where she lived. Her house was empty, of course. A single tree lifted bright, crimson flowers above the tangled yard. Here once lived a woman who loved …

+ Read More

It’s okay to feel joy

It’s okay to feel joy

“Weeping may tarry for the night But joy cometh in the morning.”   For a parent living with a son or daughter on drugs, it is impossible to feel joy. For years, I didn’t – or couldn’t.  When I tried to feel happy, thoughts of my son’s drug use erased all joy. Days were devoted …

+ Read More

Can I drink around my son?

Can I drink around my son?

Often I am asked if I drink around my son. It’s a question that comes up frequently in support groups trying to help those with an addiction to alcohol. Professionals typically suggest cleaning out the house when a loved one comes home from rehab, or at least locking up any alcohol. But that doesn’t answer …

+ Read More

Did the dog just remind me?

Did the dog just remind me?

My dog hates other dogs Normally this wouldn’t be a problem.  But we live in a town that is very dog- friendly. A three-year-old retired racing greyhound, Charlie turns into Godzilla at the sight of another canine Recently, an experienced trainer walked with us. Within seconds of our stepping outside, a medium-sized Rottweiler stared at …

+ Read More

Tears

Tears

If tears could wash away all pain, this past year surely would have cleansed our world free of it. How deep is that well? Tears shed over the loss of loved ones from COVID, from crazed gunmen, from bombings, and – of course- from opioids.  The tragedies strain our hearts.  Sadness exhausts our sympathy. There …

+ Read More

Where should I send my son?

Where should I send my son?

A mom asked me recently, “Where should I send my son?” Even to get the question, I knew we were in tough territory. The son, not quite 18, was still under his mother’s roof and under her skin. A recent inpatient stay hadn’t “fixed” him, as the mother had hoped – or worse – expected. …

+ Read More

The Phone Call

The Phone Call

My son phoned me yesterday. I was driving home from a book discussion with friends when his name popped up on my car console. What is it about unexpected calls from adult children? Are moms – parents – just trained to react with fear when a child phones suddenly? Or perhaps that’s my own peculiar …

+ Read More

Fentanyl

Fentanyl

It’s not a book for everyone.  But if your life has been affected by opioids in any way – or you are raising young children – read it. It may terrify you. Recently I moderated a book discussion for the Annapolis Book Festival with authors Ben Westhoff and Jessie Dunleavy.  Dunleavy’s memoir, “Cover My Dreams …

+ Read More

A Walk in the Park

A Walk in the Park

At first I didn’t see him. What I saw was a small heap of rags, a mound of dark colors piled on the grass. Charlie and I were out for our daily jaunt.  A two-year old, former racing greyhound, Charlie loves walking the streets, sniffing fresh green shoots and stopping short when she spies a …

+ Read More

Milestones

Milestones

A mother once asked me, “My son is about to celebrate his first year in recovery.  He invited me and my husband to attend his AA meeting.  They’re going to give him some sort of a medallion.  Should we go?” It was the “should” that caught me short. As Al-Anon teaches, there are no “shoulds” …

+ Read More