Blog & News

How do I know he’s clean?

How do I know he’s clean?

It happens often.  When my husband and I are invited to speak in family workshops to help parents and spouses of loved ones battling addiction, we learn more than we give. During a recent event – on Zoom – a mother shared her profound love for her adult daughter and her despair at not being …

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The Other Side of Social Distancing

The Other Side of Social Distancing

Social distancing may be saving lives during this pandemic.   Scientists say it’s an important step we each should take to help defeat the virus. But it may be taking lives, too. In a sad, tragic spin-off of COVID-19, alcohol and substance abuse are again on the rise in America. According to a recent research study, …

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What to do with “Worry”

What to do with “Worry”

When Jacob was using, my only worry was for him.  I never had to worry that his addiction might mingle with a deadly virus. Today I hear stories of families during this quarantine who shelter their sons and daughters suffering from addiction.  These parents watch their children come and go, unsure what frightening, new threats …

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Uncertainty

Uncertainty

Every good plan has a backup. At least, that’s what I learned in years of management. But with COVID-19, planning is difficult. When Jacob was using, I could never plan.  For a brief time we got into a semi-predictable rhythm.  He worked at a local coffee shop.  I worked at the hospital.  My husband kept …

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How long will it take?

How long will it take?

When my son was in active addiction, and I was lost how to help him – or myself – I feared looking too far into the future. For many months, each day brought a new horror.  There were discovered remnants of drug use in his room or his backpack, places I felt I had the …

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The Epidemic within the Pandemic

The Epidemic within the Pandemic

Buried on an inside page, the article was barely noticeable. When a pandemic takes over, there’s no space for other news. The headline on p.4 read: “Virus not sole factor for rise in US deaths.”  Listed among the possible causes were falls, certain types of accidents around the house, and drug overdoses. Accurate data typically lags …

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Mother’s Day: Earning it*

Mother’s Day: Earning it*

When my son was in active addiction I hated holidays. Mother’s Day was among the worst. Walking through town I passed families with teenagers, toddlers and baby carriages.  My eye would catch a grandmother smiling beside her daughter, both women sporting painfully bright pink corsages or carrying a single, long-stemmed, red rose, or worse a …

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A new gratitude list

A new gratitude list

Funny how a worldwide pandemic can prompt a new gratitude list. Husband, children, a home  – my son years into recovery – all still count. But weeks of quarantine and social distancing have added a few others. They include…   Legs that carry me three to four miles on a daily walk Other walkers who …

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Humor in the time of Corona

Humor in the time of Corona

Have you ever taken one of those online personality quizzes? Where some inscrutable formula takes your answers to lame questions and then spits out your top leadership traits? Recently, such a quiz popped up on social media.  Given these odd times, I gave it a try. After a brief questionnaire, the results came in: my …

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While the world waits

While the world waits

While we stay shuttered in, while we honor the people who serve, and pray for  healthcare workers risking their lives to save ours, I cling to what I know. During a crisis, beliefs don’t change.  They just become clearer. This day, more than ever, I am grateful for what addiction has taught me. It reminds …

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