What parent doesn’t wish for their children that they will have close, cherished friends for their lifetime?

In the immortal lyrics of Carole King (and James Taylor):

You just call out my name/And you know wherever I am/I’ll come runnin’ to see you again/…And I’ll be there/You’ve got a friend.

I always delighted in knowing my children’s friends – funny, smart, inquisitive – just like them.

But when addiction took hold of Jacob in late adolescence, other “friends” appeared.  These were shadowy, illusive young men who wandered in and out of his high school years, a few even following him to his treatment center in South Florida.

Addiction is a disease of loss – and losing close friends was just another.

I felt it first.  From the sidelines I watched as boyhood chums slipped away, graduating college, starting careers, launching lives without Jacob in them. Later, once his recovery began, Jacob felt it, too.

But gradually, as I watched the slow-motion movie from miles away, new friends emerged.  He would mention their names when we talked.  When we visited South Florida where his new life was unfolding, I would meet them, too.

There was Phil and John and Sam and Tim and more than one “Matt….”  young men building their lives like the friends of old.  They were earning degrees, starting jobs, creating a cadre of friends – all free from drugs and alcohol, unfettered by the fears and anxieties that had plagued them for years, just like Jacob.

Experts say “community” is a key factor in recovery.

If so, these new friends are Jacob’s community.  From them he has learned to rebuild his life.

Childhood friendships returned, too – like Roy and Ned and Chris.

Friends for a lifetime.

And now there is some peace in  knowing  – if he ever needs them –  he just has to call out their names…

It’s good to know he has a friend.