Certainly not kindergarten.
And certainly nothing I learned there prepared me to help a child with addiction.
What did – and still does – are the friendships and shared experiences of friends in Al-Anon.

But just when I think I’ve got this, something happens to test my resolve.

After spending a month visiting with Jacob in South Florida, where he has a very full and busy life, I come away with many questions, perhaps as only a parent can.
Is his sobriety still strong?

Yes. It seems very much so. His father and I both attended several AA meetings with him, enjoying the companionship of his friends, many who celebrate more than a decade in recovery, like Jacob.

Is his health solid overall? Is he eating well? Getting enough sleep? Enough exercise? Enough of everything he is supposed to get?
What about his job, or in Jacob’s case, jobs. Is he enjoying them? Working too much?
Are pressures on him to succeed and pay his own way causing stress? Is the stress harmful?
What about love? Is he getting enough from the people around him, from both guy and girl friends? Are they his “family” when we are not there?

So many questions. So basic. Do all parents ask these? Or is it just those who watch their children survive a life-threatening condition.

The evening before we ended our Florida visit, Jacob joined us for supper. He helped us pack the car. He did all the “son” things a son should do for a father and mother who grow older.

Within that last hug, his arms wrapped around me, he said:
“Mom, don’t worry about me. I know you do, but don’t. I’m fine.”

The parent becomes the child. Back to kindergarten.

I still have so much to learn.